110. My New Year's resolution
Karol Moroz on
Today’s post is in English, as cases of people not speaking English at all are as rare as interesting moments at school. The point is that on Monday, 3rd Jan., that is the first Monday of the year, I was late for English. My teacher came to me, while I was discussing New Year’s celebrations with my schoolmate, Marta, and ordered me to write an essay of 250 words. The result goes below.
My New Year’s Resolution — be on time in English lesson and how to achieve it
A common European custom is making New Year’s resolutions. Most of these are plans of losing a few pounds or quitting smoking. My English teacher suggested that my only resolution could be not being late for English lessons every time, as I don’t smoke, nor am I overweight. I’m not sure if I agree with that as there are many subjects of making resolutions way more interesting than those English lessons at five to nine early in the morning — I don’t even know if there is a single being in our galaxy willing to attend such lessons, but OK — I might try.
In order to achieve the goal of not being late, one needs:
- a working alarm clock loud enough to wake them up (a few hours before sunrise),
- three cubic meters of hot, „pickaxe-strong” coffee to bring them back to the awful reality, full of routine, wars and insecurities,
- and an ability to leave home 30 minutes before the lesson starts, which is almost impossible if one has such urgent needs as drinking the last cup of delicious jasmine tea or packing the survival kit (mostly books.)
The real problem with me is not that I can’t get up early enough, but that everythings seems so important. Then I realize it’s 8.40 and I still need to moisten my throat with some tap water, than it’s just too late and I can’t help it anymore. Dear teacher! It looks like I’ll never be able to come on time again.
Asskicking party
So, I just came home from 18th birthday party of my colleague from the music school, Marlena. The party was completely awesome, including large-breasted girls (or maybe just one), free alcohol and wild dances with all the women present. Fellow brass players advised me to practise more, so as to become a good player. Finally, it looks like my ability to write any meaningful text in foreign languages at 2 am can be affected by drinking beer accompanied by French fries, Greek fish, Polish hamburgers and some weird wines.
I still think a lot about my weight-height ratio. I tried to run a few laps around the place undisturbed by the sounds of traffic, but I eventually run into some friend and everything got screwed up. I still think a lot about everything I could do better in the past or that I could do better in the future, but obviously I won’t. I wonder if printing a few more sheets of lousy elephant business cards could help me prevent further development of melancholy. The only thing I know for sure is that my English sucks and I’m not going to use it in the blog for quite a moment. Maybe my next project could be an internationalized blog just in English? I’m not sure if it makes any sense, knowing that almost no one read any of the texts in Esperanto. Hopefully there are more people able to understand my terrible English than just the one, which in fact may be the same lonely person that had ever read any of the texts in Esperanto. The website could be named „Poor but Awesome”, or rather something way more corresponding to the real reality, like „Memories of an Elephant” or „Memories of the only person in galaxy who has elephant in their business cards”. Also the content management system I would code from scratch using Ruby on Rails and NetBeans, which I think are almost as awesome as the 1m girls. Together they could act as a software version of Mountainpunch and Oakextracter, famous characters from Slavic mythology; still, I’m not sure, which one could act as which of those.
Waiting for your feedback, as this could be one of the last posts here.